They Said We Got No Class....

Check Out This Jam From The "Stuck To The Sidewalk" Mixtape By Zak! Featuring The Hunks From Team Facelift....Reason Clothing Presents WE GREW HERE

Download The Mixtape @ ZAK!ZAK!ZAK!

Grown Ass Man Shit

Smokers Voice?
Check
Loose Tank Tops?
Check
Team Facelift In The Building?
Check

It's Hard For Me Not To Get Moist.

Creep Crawl

The Teen Wolf....The Young J Fox

This Video Is So Dope Like Getting Into The O.C. Dope.....It's Featuring The Creeptastic Machine From Team Facelift and The Lovely Cat Marnell....@TOECHAMP @rocketqueen89.....It's Like A Drug Fueled Dream I Had At A Mexican Carnival Minus The Donkey But Ten Times The Lust. Get This Song Off The 6 Grams Album Out NOW . If You Want To Avoid Being A Loser Check IT OUT


TEAM FACELIFT - "Heart Attack" from Matt Raz on Vimeo.

The Experience Is A Gift To You

6 Grams Is On Fire. This Latest Video From Team Facelift Featuring Trouble Andrew Is Sexy. Just Straight Up Sexy. If You Can't Digest The Sexual Tension Oozing Out Of This Video....Your Shit Is Whack, Your Dad Has Bad Breath And Your Grade School Science Teacher Touched You In The Supply Closet.

Carbon Copy Of The Season PT3

In This Month's Vanity Fair Magazine Zack "Grizzly Bush" Galifanakis Is Posing In A Woman's One Piece Bathing Suit. This Is So 2007 To Me. Below Is Baron Von Fancy Posing With His Adorable Little Sister Rocking A Generous Package. Compliment Him On His Package Please.

Here's A Vintage Team Facelift Promo Shot Back When Machine Was Still A Teen Male Model For Gap. There's Never Anything Wrong With Vintage Team Facelift. In Fact You Should All Download Their Vintage Tracks On itunes....NOW. But Never The Less I Love My Men In Drag. All Men Ingeneral. My Best Friends Are All Drag Queens. It Must Be That Smooshed Dick Look I Love In Those Skin Tight Stockings....

6 Grams Is Here!!!

Team Facelift's Latest Album Is Out! I've Been Enjoying It For The Last Few Weeks Getting Familiar With The Tracks That I'm Obviously Going To Be Listening To While I'm Walking Into Duane Reade To Purchase Plan B For One Of My Trashy Gf's Because She's Too Hungover In Her UES Apartment To Force Her Doorman To Get It For Her. So I'm Receiving Texts Up The Vageen To Get It.

6 Grams Has Officially Leaked Online. This Gold Is A Whole Other Level. This Album Is Like If James Brown Had A Baby With Harry Potter Except That Baby Only Sucked Dick For Crystal Meth Instead Of Milk. It's Magical,It's Funky....Like Old School Funky And It Makes Me Moist. The Thick Guitar Riffs, The Ill Lyrics And Phenomenal Featured Artist Are Enough To Make Any Grown Man To Slap On Some Lip Gloss And Dance.

I'll Love Everything They Do Til The Day I Die A Young Childless Woman On A Moist Mattress With A Belt Wrapped Around My Neck.(That's A Promise)

If You Don't Have One Hand Down Your Pants After Listening To 6 Shooter Featuring Rust Juxx You Must Have Erectile Dysfunction Or Have That Female Circumcision Thing Done To You, Where The Idea Of Pleasure Is Just Painful.

Fountain Of Youth Is One Of Those Jams That Makes Me Weep. Like A Rainy Day Weep Where I'm Holding My Body Pillow Of Fonda As He Sings About Farts, Finger Painting And STD's. I'm Laying In My Queen Size Bed In A Dark Room Cuddling With Pillow Fonda And I'm Just Slowly Crying.

It Just Reminds Me Of The Late Nights Where He's Sang Me Sonnets In Brooklyn. Then The Soft Chorus Flows Into Machine's Lyrics.....Machine Is Literally Living His Lyrics On This Track. His Heart Is Spewing Out Of His Mouth In This Jam....It's So Sexual. Jew Is Like The Dr. Seuss Of Rap. After A Few Rhymes I'm Hypnotized...I Almost Feel Like All Three Of Them Are Singing Just For Me. Dancing Hard Body As Each Drop Of Sweat Is Showering My Face.



It Would Be A Crime Not To Download It And Play It For Your Little Brother.


PS TOMMY MAS IS INCREDIBLE!!!!! I'M SOOO GOING To Bake You A Perfect Rum Cake. But Like A Healthy One. I Don't Want To Ruin Your Diet Of Cigarettes And Whey Protein Shakes.

Angel Eyes

This Clip Of Team Facelift Is A Q&A By Culture Shoq. The Whole Time I'm Getting Hypnotized By Machine. It's Hard Not To When He's Laying Down The Rules Of Team Facelift On You. I Swear If I Could Get Knocked Up Theses Guys Would Be The Unhappy Dads Of Some Asian Mutant Babies By Now. Shit One Would Be In Kindergarten Terrorizing His Teacher All Day Because He Wouldn't Wear Pants, Smoked Menthol Cigarettes During Lunch, Boofed The Class Hampster And Played Sex Change Doctor Way Too Many Times For It To Be Cute. Their New Album Is Coming Out Soon And Lemme Tell You It's Going To Change The World. My Mind Is Own And I'm Usually The Blower. Ha.




Team Facelift Q&A from culture shoq on Vimeo.

Let's get Fucked Up Tonight

Teaser For Team Facelift's New Album 6 Grams....Are You High Already?

Slut It OUT

The Asian Jesus Has Done It Again And Has Released His Latest Video Today On Youtube. Leather Face Has Been Laying Down The Hits With The Rest Of The Team Facelift Family. Enjoy This Gem From Our Brother!

Are You a Demon From Hell Or Just My Ex-Girlfriend?

Team Facelift- Are You a Demon From Hell Or Just My Ex-Girlfriend? from The Fat Jew on Vimeo.

Bringing Hunky Back

Tonight My Favorite Men From Team Facelift Are Performing At Santos Party House. Santos Is Known To Have The Best Speaker System in NYC To Have Your Panties Blown Off of You. From Personal Experience I Can Attest This Is True.So Fat Jew, Machine & Fonda Are Killing It Tonight With Their Epic Tunes & Sweaty Sweaty Performance. I Was About To Hop on The Last Jitney When I Was Informed About Their Performance Time And Realized That I'd Probably End Up In Jail If I Went So I Opted To Stay Home and Wait When They All Come To The Tramptons This Weekend. They Know How To Make Me Melt And I Love Them Completely.

One Time I Drove All Night To Scoop Up Fonda In Northampton Mass Just So I Could Do His Laundry In The Hamptons And Gab About Tranny Hunting, His Cat Allergies And My Asianess. I'm Working On Getting My Team Facelift Tat Soon To Show The World How Much I Love My Hunks.


Team Facelift At Santos 8/6/09 from daddy issues on Vimeo.


That Video Is From Last Summer At Santos While I Was Wearing Mini Mouse Ears and Just Stopped Filming 4 Songs In To Dance Like Whacking Waving Inflated Arm Tube Man.





That Video Is The Boys Slaughtering At BB Kings Last Week. Performing Their Love Letter To Former Mayor Dinkins.

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Fonda's Hair Is Like A Warm Sunny Day In San Dieago. You Can Always Count That It'll Be Perfect And There's Never Going To Be a Bad Day. Look AT That Curl. I'm Mean Really Exam It, It's Perfectly Executed. I Asked Him Once If I Could Write a Blog Dedicated To Just His Hair, It Would Have Been Called Follicles Of Fonda. He Didn't Turn Down The Idea But Wasn't Too Keen On The Idea That I'd Watch Him Sleep So I Could Inspect His Hair. Even Though I Know He Couldn't Possibly Have Bed Hair.....Because That Would Require Sleep. So That Idea Got The Kebosh.

Machine Has The Voice Of The New York Version Of Pepe Le Pew. By Saying That He Has The Voice of Lust. Like a Snake He Hypnotizes His Prey And Strikes Before They Realized They Were In Danger To Begin With. He's a Lover But Mess With His Newports Then Your In Trouble.

There's Not Much To Say About Fatty. Except He Smells Like Old Cheap Whiskey, Cigarettes and Johnson & Johnson Baby Shampoo. For My Birthday I Organized Five 18 Year Old Babes To Shave And Shampoo Him In My Basement. I'll Let You Assume For Yourself On What Happened That Night.


People Say They're Legends in the Making. If You Knew Them, You'd Know That Everything They Do Is Legendary. Ain't No Half Steppin' With Them.

Looking Scummy xx SXSW Edition

If Cypress Hill Gangbanged Bette Midler

Team Facelift's Latest Interview--------------------->HERE

I Hate White Woman...Like I'm Oj Simpson

Throw Back Tuesday Presents......."Have Fun"

Fat Jew Meets The Situation

Lotion In The Basket

A Glorious Adventure K&G Fashionista Style

So I Had Been a Raging Team Facelift Fan For Some Time Now. When They Were Performing At Terminal 5 at The Sneakers Pimp Show This Summer. I Kept Checking Ticketmaster Every Hour For When The Tickets Went On Sale. I Copt Two Tickets For Me and Ryland. The Day of The Show Ryland Didn't Feel Like Going. So I Called Up My Girl Gendetta, And She Was So Up FOR The Adventure I Questioned Myself Of Why I Didn't Ask Her In The First Place. She Had Brought The Sex,The Gasolina...a Mix Of Grape Amp,Vodka and I Wanna Say Syrup....It Was A Page For Memory Lane Alright....

So As We're Cruising Up To NYC....It's Raining Mad Hard, Michael Jackson Had Just Passed and It Was Obvious That New York Was Crying For The King. But Luckily Things Got a whole lot Better When We Approached The City.....

Oh Yeah....GORGEOUS! from daddy issues on Vimeo.

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We Checked Out The Scene At Sneakers Pimp Which Was Filled With Michael Jackson Memorabilia. They Had a Few Local Painters Doing Some Epic Pieces In Memory of the Recently Passed Performer. We Caught Some Awesome Kicks and Ran Into Our Pals Over At Don Clothing Selling Some Gear...











After checking Out All The Saucy Gear and Historic Video Game Joy Sticks We Snake Our Way Through The Crowd and Got Up Butt and Personal With The Stage. Speaking of Butts The Dude In Front of Us was Farting Up a Storm... This Dude Was Letting Them Loose Like He Was Christina Aguilera's Queefing Vagina in That Dirty Music Video

Sure There Was a lot of Sneaker Heads There Drooling Over Genny. I'm Pretty Sure People Thought She Was "One of Those Rap Guy's Girlfriends" We Musta Been Stopped Like 7 Times In The First Two Hours Alone...




We Left With a Few Baseball Caps And BULLLSHIT....The Boys Performed After a Few Whack Dj's Bored The Audience To Death They Had Some "Professional Skateboarders" Do Some Tricks...But This Being New York City None Of Them Completed a Trick....(Just Like In Union Sq...Never Seen a Completed Trick).....Finally My Favorite Hunks Dominated The Stage......Team Facelift!!!! Check Their Performance The Boys Are Hilarious and Most Swing States Don't Get Their Vibe But They Crack Me Up And Always Cause The Babes To Drop Those Panties.....Or Pull Out Their Tampon Strings.... I Bugged Out Hardcore......Watching Them And Being a Rampaging Tyrant in a Large Crowd Of Strangers Made My Lady Boner Slice Open My Silk Floral Pants....We Had Been Standing For Hours and All The Other Artist Were NO WHERE insight and it was Getting Super Lame But It Didn't Stop Us From Jamming Out To Some Classic Jams

Gendetta Getting Loose Like Her Name Was Papoose from daddy issues on Vimeo.

The Venue Was Dying Down Like The Fast and The Furious Franchise So We Blew That Popsicle Stand. The Night Was Pretty Epic And The Whole Event Was a Major Michael Jackson Tribute. When We Bounced We Saw This Epic Photo Of Him From a Show He Did in Japan The Summer of 1987...He Was Making Millions Cry Over How Amazing His Dance Moves and voice Was Before I Was Sucking On My Mom's Tit.

Some How We Went at Some House Party Downtown That Had Sexy Erotic Paintings That Were Covered Up With Awkward Black Pieces Of Cardboard But I Knew Better

my Boys

A CLIP of Team Facelift from the winter 2008. I blacked out this night but I'm not MAD about it. What I do remember was the grand entrance Machine,the Teen Wolf III, He was rocking a narly wig that suited his alter persona. Fonda Badonas was styled in his iconic red hoodie and leather jacket combo.The Fat Jew worked up such a heavy sweat I could taste every little salty dropple that would fly off him, whenever he danced too close to me.

a Fonda ThrowBack

After Learning Fonda Pact Doesn't Pay for Hair Cuts but in fact Does his own styling. I decided to start taking notes on his Do's.....Let the fun BEGIN!

Team Facelift Does it Big, Duh!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wFKgqeZuyEs


New York's Ruthless Do It again with their Latest Music Video. Dripping blood from their mouths can only make me wet. I love these BOYS SOOOO much!